Addiction Denial

What does addiction denial mean?

Addiction denial is when someone struggles to acknowledge their substance use problem, often downplaying the severity, making excuses or believing they have it under control.

Recognising denial is crucial because it often delays seeking help. Understanding that this is a common step in the journey can open the door to gentle conversations and support, helping the person move towards acceptance and the possibility of recovery.

Are those in denial unaware that they have an addiction?

When first reading about addiction denial, you might wonder, “Don’t they realise they’re addicted?” The answer isn’t straightforward.

It’s rare for someone with a substance use issue to be completely unaware of their problem. Often, they recognise that something might be wrong but downplay its severity. For instance, many believe they don’t have an addiction because they’ve developed ways to manage their alcohol or drug use without interfering with essential responsibilities like work.

A recent study found that many individuals genuinely think they do not have an addiction because they can maintain their daily functions. This belief reinforces their denial, making it harder to acknowledge the true extent of their substance use issues.

What factors lead a person to addiction denial?

Trying to pinpoint one reason that leads a person to deny their addiction is difficult due to the uniqueness of each situation. In this section, we take a look at some of the most common reasons a person may be in denial about their addiction, with examples of real-life interviews given by those with addiction denial.

High functionality

Some people with substance use disorders continue to meet their daily responsibilities, such as work and family duties. Because they can still fulfil these roles, they might believe they don’t have a problem. They see themselves as ‘functional’ and use this as a way to justify their substance use.

Sadly, this may be the case in the early stages of addiction but as experts state, ‘the job is always the last thing to go’, suggesting that this type of functionality comes to an end at some point during a person’s addiction.

Modification of use

Some people adjust their substance use to avoid negative consequences, like only using drugs or alcohol on non-working days. This strategy helps them avoid immediate problems, reinforcing the belief that they have their use under control and it’s not problematic.

Internalised stigma

The stigma associated with addiction can be very powerful. Many avoid labelling themselves as addicts because they see seeking treatment as an admission of defeat. They might associate it with negative stereotypes, such as being a ‘loser’ or ‘homeless’, which they don’t identify with.

Negative stereotypes

People often differentiate themselves from the extreme stereotypes of ‘addicts’ who have lost jobs or families. Because they don’t fit these stereotypes, they convince themselves their substance use isn’t severe enough to need help.

Fear of self-perception

Acknowledging the need for treatment can mean confronting negative self-perceptions and admitting personal failure. Many fear this acknowledgement because it threatens their self-confidence and sense of control over their lives.

How do I know if I’m in denial about addiction?

Realising you might have an addiction is incredibly tough, and it’s important to understand that being in denial doesn’t make you a bad person. Denial is a common and natural response when facing difficult truths. The real issue arises when denial keeps you from addressing the problem.

One of the most effective ways to determine if you’re in denial is by asking yourself some honest questions. Here are six questions that, if answered with ‘yes,’ could indicate you might be in denial about an addiction:

1. Do you frequently make excuses for your behaviour or consumption, such as blaming stress, social situations or other external factors?
2. Have friends or family members expressed concern about your behaviour or substance use, and you immediately dismissed their worries?
3. Do you often feel defensive or angry when someone suggests you might have a problem?
4. Have you experienced negative consequences (health issues, relationship problems, work-related issues) due to your behaviour or substance use but continue to believe you have it under control?
5. Do you avoid thinking or talking about the amount or frequency of your use, convincing yourself it’s not a big deal?
6. Do you believe you could stop or cut down if you really wanted to, even though previous attempts have been unsuccessful?

Answering ‘yes’ to these questions doesn’t mean you are a bad person. It means there is an underlying issue worth exploring. Acknowledging this is the first step toward getting the support and help you deserve.

How can I approach my loved one, who I feel has addiction denial?

We understand how difficult it may be in your situation now. Watching a loved one struggle with addiction denial is incredibly challenging, and approaching them about it can feel daunting. You might worry about their reaction or fear pushing them away. However, addressing the issue with care and thought can make a significant difference.

1. Educate yourself first

Before initiating a conversation, take the time to understand addiction and denial. Learning about the nature of addiction, its effects and why people might deny it will prepare you to communicate more effectively. For instance, recognising that addiction is a disease and not a moral failing can help you approach your loved one with empathy rather than judgement.

2. Choose the right moment

Timing and setting are crucial. Find a calm, private moment when your loved one is sober and not distracted. Avoid bringing up the topic during heated arguments or stressful times. For example, you could choose a quiet evening at home rather than a public setting or during a family gathering.

3. Use “I” statements

Frame your concerns using “I” statements to avoid sounding accusatory. This approach helps to express your feelings without making your loved one feel attacked. For example, instead of saying, “You have a problem with drinking,” you could say, “I’ve noticed changes in your behaviour lately, and I’m really worried about you.”

4. Stay safe

It’s crucial to prioritise your safety when dealing with someone in addiction denial. Their response might be unpredictable and they could feel attacked or become defensive. If you ever feel unsafe, have a plan to leave the situation or involve a third party, such as a counsellor or another trusted family member, who can help mediate the conversation.

5. Offer support, not ultimatums

Focus on offering support and expressing your willingness to help rather than issuing ultimatums. Let them know you’re there for them and that you want to see them healthy and happy. For instance, you could say, “I care about you deeply and want to support you in any way I can,” instead of, “You need to get help or I’m done with you.”

Offering support can also come in the form of directing them towards professional help for their addiction. Oasis Bradford, for example, offers comprehensive addiction treatment, featuring personalised care and a supportive environment. Our experienced team provides holistic therapies to address both the physical and mental aspects of addiction, guiding you towards recovery with compassion and expertise.

Get in touch with us today for more information and how you or a loved one, can begin the journey to sobriety.